as i was leaving price chopper, i stopped at the various gumball dispensers to get a watermelon gumball bc i really like how that one tastes. i had just gotten paid and i finally had quarters so i was very happy. to my dismay, somebody had put a nickel in the watermelon dispenser quarter slot, which cannot be cleared of anything that is not exactly a quarter. knowing there was no way i could possibly ever remove the nickel but still delirious from shock and denial, i poked at the nickel, wiggled it back and forth to see if it could roll, and for some reason tried to see if there was a coin release lever on the machine. finally, i stood up and decided to move onto the blueberry gumball dispenser because it was right next to it. i decided some 7-year-old had jammed a nickel in the watermelon dispenser slot bc he thought it’d be funny to ruin peoples’ day. however, the slot on the blueberry machine was all clear. i put in a quarter, turned the knob all the way around …….and nothing came out. thinking i had turned it wrong, i squatted and started jiggling the knob and attempting to shove my hand up the dispenser to see if the blueberry gumball had been released but had maybe gotten stuck somewhere on the way down. nope. at this point i was blocking people from leaving price chopper with their carts, so i stood up to let them go. i looked at all the other candy dispensers to see if there were any other gumball flavors i might like. the only one left was limeade which is a gumball flavor i’ve tried before and don’t particularly like. then i thought that the hypothetical 7-year-old kid who jammed a nickel in the watermelon dispenser must’ve experienced a very similar candy dispenser situation and shoved the nickel into the watermelon gumball machine in selfish frustration, rather than anything to do with sadism. i decided that i would settle for the limeade gumball even though i didn’t really want a gumball anymore at this point, i just wanted to spend a quarter and actually get something. so finally i put a quarter into the limeade gumball dispenser and turned the knob, not really even caring what happened. three gumballs came out instead of one. i don’t even know what to tell you or what to make of this. as happy as i would have been any other time to receive way more than i had paid for, at that moment, when i had three gumballs, i just thought, “whatever.” and finally left price chopper.

just got out of work! ^____________^

freedommmbucket

Angelyne in “Can I Do It… ‛Til I Need Glasses?” (1977)

Tags: angelyne

Angelyne - Keep A List Of All The Boys I Kiss

Tags: angelyne

(Source: paketrave)

“The abstract reads: To see whether estrus was really “lost” during human evolution (as researchers often claim), we examined ovulatory cycle effects on tip earnings by professional lap dancers working in gentlemen’s clubs. Eighteen dancers recorded their menstrual periods, work shifts, and tip earnings for 60 days on a study web site. A mixed-model analysis of 296 work shifts (representing about 5,300 lap dances) showed an interaction between cycle phase and hormonal contraception use. Normally cycling participants earned about US$335 per 5-hour shift during estrus, US$260 per shift during the luteal phase, and US$185 per shift during menstruation. By contrast, participants using contraceptive pills showed no estrous earnings peak. These results constitute the first direct economic evidence for the existence and importance of estrus in contemporary human females, in a real-world work setting. These results have clear implications for human evolution, sexuality, and economics.”

w.t.f.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estrous_cycle#Frequency

it’s from wikipedia regarding estrous cycles. after reading about melatonin’s effect on mammals i tried googling if humans were long-day breeders or short-day breeders and ran into here. how did this study ever fly?
this is an internet k-hole i didn’t think that i would run into simply by reading about melatonin.

giant fetishes have spawned the most absurd sims/cgi youtube videos that i have ever seen (but awesome bc of the absurdity?).

they may be my next obsession in a wtf-am-i-looking-at way.

i wish that somebody had the same optical prescription as me so that we could share glasses. my eyeglass wardrobe would double. this is such a good idea, where is my optical twin? @_@

i’m going to make a phone ap for this. grindr4glasses or something and make so much money. haha, not.

“What if one day you twerked so hard that you ended up going into someone’s body and the only way you leave their body is by teaching them how to master twerking and then you go to another body and it’s like quantum leap except with twerking, Quantum Twerk.” this is something that somebody asked somebody anonymously on tumblr and it is the most amazing thing i’ve read in my entire life.

although i could look at pictures of melissa shoes all night, i should probably go to sleep. drinking caffeinated drinks puts my online window shopping into overdrive.


The Little Mermaid was written as a love letter by Hans Christian Anderson to Edvard Collin. Anderson, upon hearing of Collin’s engagement to a young woman, proclaimed his love to him. He told him ”I long for you as though you were a beautiful Calabrian girl.” Edvard Collin turned Anderson down, disgusted. Anderson then wrote The Little Mermaid to symbolize his inability to have Collin just as a mermaid cannot be with a human. He sent it to Collin in 1936 and it goes down in history as one of the most profound love letters ever written.
Most scholars and psychoanalysts concluded that Anderson was bisexual; however, he never acted upon his homosexual drives.
The Little Mermaid, as it was originally written, did not have a happy ending.

The Little Mermaid was written as a love letter by Hans Christian Anderson to Edvard Collin. Anderson, upon hearing of Collin’s engagement to a young woman, proclaimed his love to him. He told him ”I long for you as though you were a beautiful Calabrian girl.” Edvard Collin turned Anderson down, disgusted. Anderson then wrote The Little Mermaid to symbolize his inability to have Collin just as a mermaid cannot be with a human. He sent it to Collin in 1936 and it goes down in history as one of the most profound love letters ever written.

Most scholars and psychoanalysts concluded that Anderson was bisexual; however, he never acted upon his homosexual drives.

The Little Mermaid, as it was originally written, did not have a happy ending.

(via marginaldesires)

wouldn’t it be so practical for a store to exist that sold exclusively lace clothing? like, right now i’m looking for a lace mint green long-sleeved top and think how many other times i’ve been looking for lace something or other…..the store would sell, say, a regular lace shirt but in 20 different colors. or just generic wardrobe staples like tank tops, vests, dresses, except all in lace. and different styles, like a lace wrap shirt or a lace shirt with lace frills. and there’d be 5 or more different lace patterns to choose from bc some lace patterns suck (for example, american apparel lace patterns (too stiff) vs. valentino lace patterns). this would seriously be so lucrative, why doesn’t this exist already???

how did my yard sale go, by the way? amazing! i made one dollar!

i’m going to try to merge with a friend’s yard sale next week and try again. i did terrible advertising/preparation for it and had it in one of the worst neighborhoods in town. i had it on the same street where 3 people got shot last summer. i couldn’t have it outside my apartment building because that’s not allowed, so i had it outside my friend tim’s house which happens to be in a crummy neighborhood (and also 3 buildings down from where i used to live 6 months ago).

seriously though, i was selling everything for a dollar and only one person bought something. stuff still with tags that’s really nice. argh. i guess it didn’t help that i was only there for an hour before i packed up and left, but i wanted to make it to my friend’s bbq, too and at that point i’d realized that nobody was going to buy anything anyway bc of the location. better luck next time…..

also this is my new favorite dress and i love it so much and i want to wear it every single day this summer. i can’t believe that i almost didn’t buy it, it’s perfect.

also this is my new favorite dress and i love it so much and i want to wear it every single day this summer. i can’t believe that i almost didn’t buy it, it’s perfect.

i work at the dmv and we get work merchandise/freebies.
dmv hat and pocket flashlight. i might wear this hat every day this summer, or perhaps my mr subb hat. PUT DOWN YOUR CELLPHONE. don’t text and drive! -_-
seriously though, if you are talking on your cellphone, looking at your cellphone’s gps, changing your tunes, texting, or even thinking about your cellphone, you will get pulled over and get a ticket. it is 3 points on one’s license and because of a new york state initiative, probably not something a judge is going to plead down. just FYI. be safe! or, you know, at least not $300 poorer because you had to pay a fine.

i work at the dmv and we get work merchandise/freebies.

dmv hat and pocket flashlight. i might wear this hat every day this summer, or perhaps my mr subb hat. PUT DOWN YOUR CELLPHONE. don’t text and drive! -_-

seriously though, if you are talking on your cellphone, looking at your cellphone’s gps, changing your tunes, texting, or even thinking about your cellphone, you will get pulled over and get a ticket. it is 3 points on one’s license and because of a new york state initiative, probably not something a judge is going to plead down. just FYI. be safe! or, you know, at least not $300 poorer because you had to pay a fine.